ALHAWIAT

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I was born in 1962 in Rashidieh Camp, in the South of Lebanon. I come from a bedouin family from Palestine, that fled the 1948 war. 

When I was only a teenager, I was enrolled in the Lion Cubs of the Fatah, a military training camp for children. 

At 17, during the Lebanese conflict, I became the women’s leader of an armed militia. We were part of a larger group, whose leader, Abu Roum, quickly became my husband - and still is !

In the late 80’s, we even went to Cuba to have further training in terms of resistance and fighting. 

Back in Lebanon, the men gave us missions that were only possible for us, women, as no one would suspect our involvement in the conflict. For exemple, we transported weapons or money in baby cribs, or sent pregnant women through checkpoints as they wouldn’t be searched or suspected. 

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But one night in 1983, a group of 30 Israeli soldiers erupted in my home while I was asleep. There were tanks outside, the soldiers had guns, speakers and were turning everything upside down. Suddenly, I was cuffed, my eyes were banded, guns were pointed at my head, and just like that, they took me away ! 

I was taken to Al Bus, in a disaffected school that the Israeli army used as a prison. During the first five days, I was tied in a bag, with just my head sticking out, and only taken out of it to go to the bathroom or eat a few slices of bread a day. Quickly they started using psychological torture, and threatened me every day of rape or that they would kill me and my relatives. It turned out they wanted to know where my husband was, as they wanted to dismantle his militia. 

But I was strong, and never told anything. I knew that if I did, dozens would die. So being the only one killed seemed like the only option. I had a responsibility toward my group and my partners.

It went on for weeks, at some point they even tried to trick me with poisoned tea. And one day, they left me out in the courtyard with other prisoners. I saw a woman from my group, that admitted giving my name away under torture. 

 

But when they understood that they would get nothing from me, they suddenly released me. 

A Palestinian spy of the Fatah, infiltrated among the Israeli officials, was waiting outside, and took me away in a large black car with tainted windows. He even took me to a fancy restaurant to reward me of my silence ! I was in such another universe all of a sudden …

 

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Now that the war is over, I understand that our resistance needs to be pacific if we want to sustain peace. I’m now responsible for all the Palestinian women of Tyr area. I teach them, especially the younger generation, that they can and should be equally qualified as men in terms of education, politics, everything !

I organise awareness campaigns against gender based violence, and women’s rights. We also pressure the Palestinian political sphere so women can be equally participating to politics. There is only 20% of women in the PLO at the moment. We need to reach 50% !

But the legislations for refugees in Lebanon lead to a vicious circle. Youth with even the highest diplomas are denied access to jobs in sectors such as medicine, law or commerce. It leads to terrible consequences. We now have to face severe problems with drug addiction and violence issues.

 

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And yet, we know that education is now our best weapon.